Most people know that I RARELY take days off from work. Because of this, the end of the year creeps up with a calendar full of unused vacations days and I am often told to “use it or lose it”. Believe me, there have been many years where I have opted to “lose” the days and keep working.
This year, this week, starting with today, I am “using” my vacation days. What will I use the free time for? Perhaps pack up and head for a sunny beach? Not me. I am going to stay right here in the boring, barren bleak January weather of my hometown.
I need to find something that I seem to have misplaced. We all lose things over any given period of time like reading glasses, wallets, keys, ice scrapers, small pets… Most things turn up quickly after a frantic search. Other things might take a bit more time to pop back into view like a favorite t-shirt in the laundry, a fancy earring behind the sofa, the Tupperware in the back of the fridge with something that has gone from Thanksgiving leftovers to science experiment… eventually, most things turn up.
You might be running through a list of lost doodads right now and wondering where they might be. At this moment, I have decided to slow down and figure out where I might have lost my ‘funny’.
Strange thing to say, huh? How do you lose ‘funny’?
I have heard people accused of losing their sense of humor, which I don’t think is what I am missing. I still laugh. I just don’t feel like I have made other people laugh as much as I would like.
Life happens… Bad days happen… Politics happen… Funerals happen… Friends break up… Social media explodes… Bills pile up… Things break… Bullies bully…
In all the chaos, somewhere along the way, I lost my ‘funny’ and I want it back.
The irony is that the past year was pretty good for me. I just think that somehow there were a lot of extremes. For every really great thing that happened, soon after something terrible happened to counterbalance it. In order to avoid living like a yo-yo, I clung to the middle ground for the sake of my sanity. I became emotionally average. And there really isn’t anything funny about average.
Average is beige. It’s not warm or cold. It’s not exhilarating or exhausting. Average is like custard without enough sugar or spice.
I have become a shapeless lump of beige, flavorless, lukewarm custard on a gray January morning. Have you ever felt like this?
Perhaps we need to reevaluate our priorities. Maybe if we just focus a little less on the stuff that’s bad and bitter and add a little more spice or share a smile that’s a little bit bigger we can find what we are missing.
For now, however, after 3 cups of coffee, I hope you don’t mind if I excuse myself to run to the ladies room.
Here’s to and exciting, flavorful and colorful New Year!
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About Cat Wilson
