I want to start out by reminding you that I do not have children of my own. I do, however, adore kids. I am lucky that I have many children in my life who are very dear to me. Most of my friends have children and they are generous enough to let me be part of their lives.
Because of this, I am often thought of as the silly big sister or crazy aunt to a whole lot of kids here on the Cape – and I do get a attached to them and consider them my family.
That said, I have a question for the parents who might be reading this blog: What would you do if you found this note in your child’s back pack after school?
“Dear Mom,
People are being mean to me today… I love u
Please talk to me
Love you
Love…”
And it was signed by her son.
I was overwhelmed with emotion reading this note that one of my friends shared on her Facebook page.
What a brave little boy who actually asked for his mother to talk to him. What had happened to him and how long had his classmate(s) been mean to him?
I wanted to swoop in and offer to be a personal body guard for this little boy. I had visions of scolding children on the playground and in the hallways of the local elementary school and riding the bus to and from school with him to deter further incidents. Of course, I can’t do that.
As I said, I do not have any children of my own, but I do remember what it was like to be a child who was often picked on and sometimes bullied.
That’s me in the 1st grade!
According to the National Center for Education Statistics, better than one out of five students reported they had been bullied. Of those students, 13% were made fun of, called names, or insulted; 12% were the subject of rumors; 5% were pushed, shoved, tripped, or spit on; and 5% were excluded from activities on purpose.
The same study revealed that bullied students indicate that bullying has a negative effect on how they feel about themselves, their relationships with friends and family and on their school work, and physical health.
So what can you do? It’s not an easy question, but there are some things you can do.
According to the website StopBullying.gov, “Bullying prevention approaches that show the most promise confront the problem from many angles. They involve the entire school community – students, families, administrators, teachers, and staff such as bus drivers, nurses, cafeteria and front office staff -in creating a culture of respect. Zero tolerance and expulsion are not effective approaches. Bystanders who intervene on behalf of young people being bullied also make a huge difference.”
We want to believe children are comfortable at school and everyone gets along and plays well together. Even as adults, we know that not everyone gets along, and some people are mean. We learn how to interact with each other at a very young age.
Please talk to your children and hug them often. Also, teach them compassion. Teach them to step in when they see a problem or to talk to an adult. Children carry the lessons they learn in school with them throughout their lives.
By the way, I am more than willing to spend time any children (or adults) who feel like they are being picked on or bullied… And as you know, I have a hug for anyone who needs one!
And finally, if , like me, you don’t have children of your own, but you’d like to make a difference, you could volunteer your time with a group like Big Brothers Big Sisters of Cape Cod and the Islands.
Do you have a story to share? Email; me: [email protected]
About Cat Wilson
